Twenty-two.

I'm not going back; I'm moving ahead
I'm here to declare to You: my past is over
In You, old things are made new
I surrendered my life to Christ
I'm moving, moving forward

These words have begin to sink in and settle in my heart and I've decided this:

What's been done before and the things of the past, of last year, or last week, or a few minutes ago--those things that didn't work out, held me back, or didn't move me or push me towards excellence as a Christ-follower--those things don't matter now. I have new visions and dreams and new goals to set, creating new choices to make. It's a new day, and I'm going to rejoice and be glad in it and that God gave me a second chance when he sacrificed His Son 2,ooo years ago.

When I dwell in the past, I've decided to repeat the same trip I've taken before. What I found at the end of the road yesterday, I'm going to find the same today. I need to pick a new route, in order to see new results. Pastor Ben said this recently: "You can't keep doing the same old things and expect different results." That's so true.

And when he said that, I decided that I needed to grow and progress. I can't expect for new things to arise and keep doing the same old stuff over and over. I need to change in order for things to change. Mike tells me often that you can't lead people where you haven't already been. So if I want the students in Reality to grow as worshippers and to become more passionate, I have to do that. If I want them to seek God, I need to.

So, that's what I'm going to do. I'm going to set out on a new and improved spiritual journey to seek God in all things and to dig into His Word and listen for His guidance. God has plans for me and sometimes I think I miss them because I simply become too lazy to listen or too lazy to ask Him what to do.

This year, I plan to wake up a whoppin' 15 minutes earlier so that I can talk to God and listen to what He has in store for me. And since it is so difficult for me to wake up early, I need to work myself into going to bed earlier. Please pray that I can do these things in order to grow closer to God, who longs to build a relationship with me.

As for me--I'm moving forward!

Twenty-one.

Finally. A new blog.

I have now realized the true meaning of: "I don't really have that much time for blogs" and definitely agree with whosoever chooses to say it.

So my weekly blog went to "oops, I forgot this week" to "whenever I can, which isn't very often" when I started working at the church this past summer.

It has been quite an awesome experience to work at a church. It went from God's house that I only visit twice a week or so, to a place I can consider a home where people love me and allow me a chance to grow as a leader and to grow closer to God.

The First Assembly pastors and staff are great! They have accepted me as a part of their team and it is so overwhelming.

Trust me, its so strange for me to say "my desk" in "my office" at my "job" or my "work". I can hardly grasp that whole concept.

I remember being the nerdy 6th grader that wanted, literally, to be Pastor Steve, wearing his suit jacket in Sunday School and his name tags after Reality, just joining the Reality Worship Team and eventually understanding the true meaning of worship the next few years of Junior High. Now...I'm not so obsessed with P.Steve, but am still so grateful that I can work in an office outside of his and learn from him from a different stand-point than ever before. I've taken on a challenge proposed by he and Pastor Rod, and thank God everyday for even being asked to join the First Assembly team and to become an intern learning leadership lessons that no one else will ever have the opportunity to learn the way I have and still am learning. After being there everyday since June, I couldn't imaging doing anything else.

I really understand the phrase "everything is better in teams". Not to say I didn't understand it before, but to say that after witnessing it in the everyday lives of the pastors and staff around me it has become a true reality in my life.

God has blessed me with people like P.Rod and P.Steve and Mike Winslow that are constantly pushing me forward towards excellence in everything.

Thank God for a church who cares about a 16-year-old student who isn't perfect and isn't even mature in most areas of life. Thank God. Thank you, First Assembly!

Twenty.

Hello.

Worship...

...was passionate tonight at Reality. God's presence was BIG! As I looked about the room from the stage, I noticed hands and voices raised to God like I haven't seen in Reality in a while. It was cool. And it is cool....

Do you ever just know that God is near. Or that He's moving around, stirring things up that have been settled for far too long? God is taking over my peers and making them into His worshippers. How awesome--to be called God's, to belong to God.

I belong to God because He made me.

I belong to God because He bought me with His own blood.

I belong to God because He has a home for me in the future.

I belong to God because He has made me His worshipper. I make God smile. He sees me and Reality with our hands raised and our hearts open, and He smiles.

You know, smiles are great. When someone smiles at me, no matter what my day has looked like or what sort of mood I'm in, I get happy and I feel loved.

That's only if another person smiles at me. Think about God! When He smiles at us, how loved and how joyous we should be.

So just think--when we worship and acknowledge God's glory and His power, He smiles. And smiles, for some reason, make people happier.

Thus, us worshipping = God smiling = us happier people. Sounds like a good deal to me.

Nineteen.

Wow. It's been forever since I've last commented.

So, I just got back last Friday from the Deepening.

Wow! It was amazing! I got a lot closer to God and really developed a great hunger for Him. I also feel that I am going through an awesome growth spurt in leadership and spiritually, partially, I think, as a result of such an impacting trip. I'm ready to worship this week in Reality and to see the other students engage in worship as well. I think after this past week in Grapevine, Reality worship is only going to get more and more passionate and that we will only grow closer and closer to God. I saw some really intimate worshippers develop last week; even people I never would have imagined raising there hands were on their knees, hands raised, pouring their life out to God. I can't wait to see where He leads our youth group. It's going to be great!

Eighteen.

Don't you want to be an good and wise person? Doesn't everyone?

After spending time in the Bible today at the church, I've decided to make that one of my ambitions--to be a good and wise person. Sounds exciting, right? Haha.

So I read in James 3, that wisdom, God's wisdom, begins with a holy life and is characterized by getting along with others. It is gentle and reasonable, overflowing with mercy and blessings. So I thought, that's accomplishable! I can get along with people and be reasonable, and
can have an abundance of mercy and blessings, right? Of course it may take a lot of effort to get along with everyone and be totally forgiving and generous, but still its doable.

Then I read Psalms 112. It said this of a good person: giving; solid and lasting reputation; unfazed by rumor or gossip; heart ready, trusting in God; firm spirit, relaxed among enemies; ceaseless generosity; an honored life, and a beautiful life. This time I though to myself, I've got to work on the giving thing a little, I'm pretty sure my reputation is okay, I might need some help on being unfazed by rumor/gossip, I know my heart is ready and trusting in God, I don't have many enemies but I know that they don't affect me unbearably, and that I usually like to share. And of course, I would love to have an honored and beautiful life. Again, this is all doable. I can work on these things.

That's when I got a little excited about being a good, wise person some day. I want an honored life, and a beautiful one as well. Now I know what wisdom looks like and I want to go for it. I want to be gentle and reasonable, getting along with people, unfazed by rumor and gossip, absolutely generous and giving, and overflowing with blessings.

That's what God wants all of us to be right? My goal for now is to work on becoming a good and wise person, not that I will completely accomplish it anytime soon, but that I'll be striving for it.

I challenge you, too, to share the same ambition that I have. To be good in God's eyes and to have wisdom, like God's wisdom.